In July 2024, I completed my goal of becoming a Certified Family Dog Mediator.
This course was intensive and provided fascinating insights that affirmed my belief that the way we traditionally think about “training” needs to evolve. We explored a wealth of information regarding ethology, ecology, epigenetics, canine genetics, and breed groupings and even delved into some aspects of human psychology. Being the science nerd I am at heart; I did my own deep dives and further research and reading as I moved through the course units. My life’s work, passion, and livelihood is to pursue knowledge of and educate others in human and canine togetherness. The details matter to me, regardless of how many calls I receive asking me to just “fix it.”
That isn’t my job. My job is educator, translator, advocate, consultant, and mediator, and some have used the term therapist to some extent.
For my dogs, I take on the responsibility of guardian, educator, advocate, protector, caregiver, partner, and friend.
I often explain this concept to clients using the parenting model of relationships. While we can also discuss other relationship models, like upper management or the Military, these don’t resonate as well, so I primarily focus on the parent-child model.
Our relationship with our dogs shouldn’t revolve solely around obedience. The “obedience” portion of the training is only a piece of the whole training puzzle. It has its place but is most effectively viewed through the lens of communication. This involves creating a shared language to convey information, instructions, and guidance to the wonderful animals that share our lives. You may recall me emphasizing that “obedience is fundamentally about communication.” The things we can achieve and teach our dogs are truly incredible.
Yet, the root of it isn’t determined by the number of words we can teach them or how many names of toys they can recognize, but rather how they are integrated into our homes and lives through their relationships and experiences as sentient beings. Dogs hold a meaningful place and purpose in our lives, but they shouldn’t be our adult replacements for once-doted-upon childhood stuffed animals or surrogate lovers, babies, or parents. They are our friends and confidants, partners who once played a vital role in the survival of the human race.
Dogs have needs as unique species. These needs are often neglected or unfulfilled in our modern world, which has removed us from nature and survival needs. We no longer need dogs for their utility. Still, they tend to make us feel good, be our arm candy, fill emotional voids, become replacement children, or elevate societal status. Look - I am not demonizing these things. They are not inherently bad. But they can be. There’s a risk that these contemporary uses of dogs could lead to neglecting animal welfare and just becoming weird.
I sometimes call my dogs my kids. I did not have children but always wanted them, so yes, my dogs fill that void in my heart and life. And much like a parent-child relationship, I am responsible for their wellbeing. But I love and respect them as the animals they are, as dogs. I have “asked” them to be a part of my life. In doing so, I am responsible for ensuring their needs are met, and I provide a quality of life that suits their genetics as a canine - not a human.
Our dogs often feel out of place in today’s world. We selectively bred these remarkably intelligent animals to assist us and support our survival as a species. We bred them to be hunters, guardians, trackers, herders, rodent killers, and even literal flea magnets. For thousands of years, they have lived alongside humans, playing a crucial role in the survival of our species. We would not be here without the assistance of dogs.
Let’s talk briefly about what we are encountering at unprecedented levels with modern dogs.
As professionals, we are encountering an alarming increase in behavioral issues among family dogs, including those from breeders, shelters, and rescue organizations. Common problems include anxiety disorders, intolerance, frustration, lack of self and independence, withdrawal from social connections or environments, violent tendencies, mood swings (“out of nowhere”), destruction, self-harm, and addictions or obsessive behaviors. What does this sound like when we speak with potential clients? To name a few common complaints: separation anxiety, crate anxiety, jumping, tail chasing, sofa destruction, resource guarding, won't come when called, escaping the yard, human aggression or reactivity, dog aggression or reactivity. These things are not “training” problems. But they are welfare, education, guidance, and awareness problems.
Those issues have little to nothing to do with obedience and commands. They are issues rooted in the relationship between humans and canines and in understanding their L.E.G.S.
Enter the L.E.G.S. model. L.E.G.S. stands for:
L - Learning
E - Environment
G - Genetics
S - Self
These four elements converge to create the life experience of our dog as an individual. For years, I have asked detailed questions relating to these elements. I now have even more insight into why my questions are relevant and what other questions we must ask as professionals. I can tell many clients are annoyed by my line of questioning, digging for more information. This goes back to the skewed way of thinking about life with our dogs - the “just fix my dog” mentality. But your dog is not a broken AC unit that needs a new part and will be as good as new. I also can tell when clients cannot be bothered to read the guides provided at the beginning of our process together, with my Pet Parent Guide and Wellness Guide. I can tell there is a lack of appreciation for the simple foundation games of Search and Freedom of Choice. Yet these are the building blocks on which I can help the dog find even the tiniest bit of fulfillment and see their world through a different lens. This begins to offer your dog the clarity they have been craving, often relieving completely unnoticed stress levels in most dogs I work with.
I will not stop asking questions. They are a critical component of my job as an advocate for the dog and the family's goals.
Now, in a very real, raw moment - this profession is exhausting. We endlessly repeat ourselves to the same people, but what we are explaining, answering, showing, or teaching very often falls on deaf ears. To be repeatedly asked to “fix my dog or else…” makes one weary beyond what most are willing to deal with. The compassion fatigue and burnout are palpable. Hear me now when I say - it is never the dogs that wear us professionals to the bone. The human may pay the bills, and the human side of the welfare is crucial and must be treated with compassion - but I serve at the pleasure of the dog.
Studying the L.E.G.S. model strengthens my approach to the “training” process, which I have used for several years. I now have more connections and an in-depth understanding of the “whys” behind much of our work.
If we are going to bring dogs alongside us in this life, it is our responsibility to show them what this life means to them, how to navigate life in the environments we place them in, to provide for their appropriate welfare needs as dogs - not what appeals to us as humans. We must learn what their ancestry might be telling them to do, how to work with their genetics (the ones we bred them for), and have compassion for how this clashes with our modern integration of the pet dog. We must learn how they communicate with us, teach them how we communicate, and how we can develop our communication system that blends the two with a natural wonder and beauty that few other inter-species relationships will ever realize in this iteration of the Earth.
Stop for a moment every day to appreciate the joy of watching your dog just be a dog.
Want to learn more about how I can help you as a Certified Family Dog Mediator with your dog training and relationship needs? Email me at andrea@bestlifecanine.com.
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